You can’t really see me but if you set your audio to maximum, you can hear the speech pretty well.

See, you don’t need to speak English all that well to write okay in it.  :-)  (A long time ago, Bettie Sharpe confessed that before she first heard me, she’d imagined I spoke with a smoky voice, kind of like an expat in a French cafe. Darn it. I think I should too.)

My gratitude goes to my RWA roommie Kristyne Raley, for taking the video and then transferring it to a USB stick for me.  (Btw, Kristyne, your USB stick is so fancy it took me a minute to realize it has two ends!  Hmm, did I just reveal again how much of a Luddite I am?)

Since we are it, a couple more foreign covers.  Up first, Slovene HIS AT NIGHT.  The cover model is awfully pretty, but I’d always pictured Elissande a bit fuller–both in the face and in the bosom.  :-)

And now, the upcoming German reissue of PRIVATE ARRANGEMENTS.  From what I understand, Cora Verlag (Harlequin Germany) first distributes their titles to train stations and other such convenience spots.  And then later a book might get repackaged for the bookstores.  So here is the repackaging and I’m very excited to have my first leads-lying-down-together cover.

That’s all, folks.  For now.

1. Pre-Departure

Everywhere I look, I see authors with other artistic talents.  They can paint, draw, sew, knit, quilt, garden, graphic design, compose, play instruments, and whatnot.  I play casual games and have nothing to show for it.  (Well,  lots of good memories with the kidlets but His Hawtness and I debate on whether that constitute as quality time.   I say yes. *g*)

But ever since the shea butter episode, I’ve developed an obsession with hand-making beauty products.  Not for myself, but as promo items.  For RWA Orlando I did bath bombs.  Facial scrubs for New Jersey RWA’s conference and RT Los Angeles.  In between I also made solid lotion bars as belated Christmas presents.

By the beginning of the year I’d already decided to make lip butters for RWA.  I’d really, really hoped that by June I’d have a cover for the first book in my 2012 trilogy, but since the release is still 11 months out, no.  All the same, my enthusiasm remained undimmed.  I love giving away good swag.  I love doing repetitive chores, especially fresh from deadlines.

Here’s the lip butter chronicle, for Janine especially, starting with empty jars.

And now they are being filled. 

Next the caps go on.

The above batch is for Courtney Milan.  Next batch is for me.

This is the image I used:

My name appears a bit off center since I had to correct for the idiosyncracies of my printer.

And this is the bottom label:

And yes, those are the tentative titles and release dates for the trilogy.  We are set on the first title, but the other two hadn’t quite finished the testing process yet.

I had a blast.  Made 900 of them and took about 800 to NYC.  They went really fast.  And now I have to think what to do next year.  :-)

2) The conference

Even more fun and more exhausting than usual, since it is NYC.

I went to the Alexander McQueen exhibit, which is macabre and stunning.  On my way back I passed this house on Fifth Avenue.  I recognized it as the template I used for Camden’s New York townhouse in Private Arrangements.  Like seeing an old friend.

This picture is from Random House’s offices, overlooking Central Park.

Le sigh.

And here’s my roomie Shellee, also known as one third of Ivy Adams, author of The International Kissing Club, before the New York Public Library.  Some chicks are born to pose.  So jealous.

The trouble with RWA?  Not enough time.  I didn’t get to see enough of Meredith, of Kristan Higgins, or Julie James, of…The list goes on and on.  I didn’t even get to see enough of my roommates!

But still it was a good one, I have to say.

HIS AT NIGHT won the RITA® for Best Historical Romance.  It was such an incredibly tight category that I didn’t even bother prepare notes for a speech.  The thrill was all the sweeter as His Hawtness flew in that afternoon to be with me.  He’d been kicking himself for missing the RITA moment in Orlando.  But I wasn’t so sure that it would be a good idea for him to come, since the chances of repeating was next to nil.  But woot, he got his way and it was awesome.

We stayed in New York over the weekend and went all over Manhattan.

I love greenery on balconies, especially balconies overlooking Central Park.

Look at those spikes.  So that’s how a Manhattan townhouse protects itself from cat burglars.

I wish my garbage can was half so pretty.

LOL.

And of course, this.

I would not have gone had His Hawtness not wanted to see it.   The Statue of Liberty is an over-familiar sight and I usually stay away from long lines crowded places.  Besides, I stepped onto American soil not via New York but San Francisco, five thousand miles to the West and across a different ocean.

But I’m so glad we went.  The moment Lady Liberty came into view, I had tears in my eyes.  Unlike many immigrants into the country, I did not come to the United States to escape persecution or a life of hardship.  I had a happy, safe childhood in China, surrounded by friends and a tightly knit neighborhood community.

But this is where I have made my home.  This is where I vote in every election, big or small.  This is the birthplace of my children.  And I am part of the fabric of American life.

3) Foreign Covers

You didn’t think I was going to forget them, did you?

First up, Turkish Private Arrangements.  I am so often a NYT bestseller overseas.  Why not here too?  :-)

Google Translator tells me the title means Signed with Marriage. I can totally get behind it.

Spanish paperback edition of Delicious.  I squeal every time there is food on a Delicious cover.

Italian Delicious. Love the pearls.

Russian Not Quite a Husband. Retitled Can Not Forget. Be still my heart, is that a streak of white I see in her hair?

And last, but definitely one that gave me a whole day of lols, German Not Quite a Husband, retitled Dangerous Passions.

When I saw the image this morning I immediately did a double take.  Is it…?  Yes it is.  The stepback from Joanna Bourne’s The Spymaster’s Lady!   I don’t know why but I’m still giggling.

(By the way, I had the great pleasure of sitting next to Jo at the RITAs, and more adorable and witty company I could not have hoped for.)

And this concludes the report on the first part of my summer.  :-)

So let’s see, what all happened since I last posted.

RWA Orlando

It’s always fun to attend a RWA conference. But the highlight of my conference, without a doubt, was this:

The preparations leading up to the awards ceremony was the same as the year before.  I had a couple of commitments that left me about forty-five minutes to get ready.  I threw on my dress.  My roommate Kristyne did my make-up. My other roomie Shellee flat-ironed my hair.  (My hair, left to its own devices, is wavy.  And since it is never not left to its own devices, it was the first time I’d ever seen my hair completely straight.  I was thrilled to discover that I looked like a Hong Kong gangster’s moll–the expensive sort, of course!)  My other, other roomie Tracy, my bedmate actually, introduced me to the wonder that is the vibrating mascara applicator last year.  This year she did nothing to help me!  LOL, because Tracy, a first-time nominee, had to get her own gorgeous self ready for the event.

Right before I left my hotel room, I tore a small strip off the edge of a newspaper that’s been lying around.  I figured, just in case, I should jot down a few reminders of people I wanted to thank.

(I didn’t do this last year because last year I was nominated for PRIVATE ARRANGEMENTS, and had I won, you’d have heard me thank myself.  Seriously, somebody should give that speech, for all the writers out there who don’t give themselves quite enough credit.  Since PA was written on my own time, at my own instigation, without ever inconveniencing any family  members, I figured it was the only time in my career I could say, “And most importantly, I want to thank me for never giving up on me.  I would never be here if it weren’t for me!”   I’d have done it too–I can see Shellee, Kristyne, and Tracy all nodding their heads going, yep, she totally would have–except for the fact that my name didn’t get called!)

This time it did get called.

Even as Teresa Medeiros, the presenter for the historical category, read the list of nominees, I was scrutinizing the same list on my program and wondering if it was going to be Elizabeth Hoyt, Liz Carlyle, or a complete dark horse.  And then came the drumroll.

Until then I had no idea who it would be; my gut is usually dormant when it comes to such matters.  As soon as the drumroll started, however, I sort of knew.

Somebody hugged me from behind–my agent, as it later turned out.  And then I was upon that stage.  And I am totally mortified about it now, but as I was walking across to the podium, I heard my name shouted from  the back in the ballroom–and I waved.  Waved, like a beauty queen!  *dies of embarrassment*

The statuette is surprisingly heavy.  Perfect-for-braining-home-intruders heavy.  I pulled out my little piece of paper–reproduced below–and poured out my gratitude.  It can never be said enough that I needed all the help I could get on NOT QUITE A HUSBAND–on each book since PA, in fact–and if I look back and see only one pair of footprints, it was probably because my editor carried me.  And so the award was dedicated to her.

I did forget one line on the list–the line that said “everyone.”  So if you are reading this, I want to thank you–and thank you again–for everything.

I got my picture taken more times that night than at my wedding.  Drank a bit of champagne–and that’s not an euphemism but literally two sips.  And then went back to my room to hang with them what brung me, my wonderful roommies.

And then, I put on my headphones and listened to this song three times straight.  It is called, aptly enough, “Just for Tonight.”

This is a tough business. But it does have its occasional glorious moments.

(The video is incomplete. The full version does not allow embedding, but you can access it here.)

San Diego

I had the good fortune to spend five weeks in San Diego this summer.

His Hawtness was working there, the family joined him for some time before RWA.  On route to Orlando I dropped off the kids at their grandparents’.  From Orlando I went back to SD for a nice little grownups-only time with the honey.

I love San Diego.  True, I was shocked upon arrival that it is so arid–I was expecting a humid maritime climate, like my hometown in China, not taking into consideration Southern California’s proximity to the deserts.  But other than that, the weather could not have been more delightful, especially coming from the heat of a Texas summer.  (This year wasn’t quite as bad; last year we had 100 days over 100F.)

We went to the beach.  We hiked.  I wrote in a public library with a spectacular view of the ocean.  I visited my jewel of a critique partner, Janine, and the awesome Bettie Sharpe in LA–sprinting like mad to catch my train back to SD because we were having so much fun.  They in turn visited me in SD.

And, of course, His Hawtness and I stumbled upon a clothing-optional beach. (Janine and Bettie, it was where we did not go down to the beach.) Imagine, it was near twilight, we were having this wonderful walk on this largely empty beach that goes on for miles and miles.  There were a few people fishing, some joggers, others on an evening constitutional–perfect normalcy, if you will.   And all of a sudden I blurted, “Is that man not wearing anything?”

It was exciting stuff, let me tell you, even though I kept my eyes averted from the dangly bits–and not out of modesty either, but so as not to laugh. Anyway, nude beach! This suburban soccer mom has never seen one before.  And now she has.

Thank you, San Diego.

Latest Foreign Covers

French DELICIOUS

Spanish paperback DELICIOUS

Books

For a while there, I thought there was no more to say after foreign covers, and then of course, I had to smack my forehead.

I am writing a new trilogy for Berkley.  The schedule pub dates are May, June, and September of 2012.  From now to end of next year I have to produce three books.  I’ve never had such tight deadlines before.  Send speedy vibes my way!

Jersey Shore

I am going to give my chemistry workshop–which has totally become my workhorse presentation–at NJRWA’s Put Your Heart in a Book conference Oct 22-24. I am very excited about it, not only because I’ve never been to New Jersey–or a big regional conference, for that matter–but also because I am going to room with Meredith, whom I haven’t seen since RWA D.C.

I am going to attempt to shame her into writing an update blog post, so we know what she’s been up to. Wish me good luck!

But below, in no particular order, are the highlights of my trip.

1) The Woodley Park Zoo metro stop.  The escalator coming out of the metro stop is the longest and steepest escalator I’ve ever seen.  Going up for the first time, I had the distinct sensation that the man some ten, twelve steps higher up was hanging on for dear life directly above me.  It was dizzying, but in the best way.

2) The digital publishing experts.  I think I’d met both Angela James of Samhain Publishing and Kassia Krozser of Book Square and Quartet Press before–Kassia owns a very cool Barbara Cartland romance board game, if I remember correctly from RWA 2008 in San Francisco–but I didn’t really have a chance to speak with either.  This time I did.  And it was informative and eye-opening and most reassuring, to know that the wild, wild frontier of digital publishing is manned by cool, calm, in-charge women who know exactly what they are doing.

3) My editor.  We’ve worked successfully together on three books–and when I say successful, I mean she says jump and I ask how high –but I’d never met her in person before.  The red metro line in D.C. was undergoing work in the wake of the recent terrible accident.  I didn’t experience any delays, but on the evening we were to meet, Caitlin did, coming from the other side of D.C.  So as I waited in the restaurant, examining all the women coming inside, some of them looking rather alarming, I was getting a bit anxious.  But Caitlin in person was ADORABLE, so crazy-cute and charming.  We had a delightful meal and I promised her I would think seriously about a trilogy.

4) My workshop.  I’d begun to worry about my workshop long before.  And while I was working on it, I dug up an old guest blogging entry I wrote for The Plot Monkeys, on physical desirability, called “Beyond Boobs and Buttocks!”  In the post I’d written:

For the longest time, the topic I had in mind was Chemistry.  It is one of the most important ingredients in a successful romance, and one that is seldom addressed.  And then I realized, of course, why it doesn’t come up very often in craft topics, because trying to teach romantic chemistry is like trying to teach someone how to live a rich, fulfilling life: the topic is so vast and cmplex that I either have to devote my entire life to it or I’m reduced to meaningless slogans like “Beyond Boobs and Buttocks!”

Guess who forgot her own advice and proposed a workshop on Chemistry at Nationals?  Yes, me.  So there I was, struggling with this vast and complex topic on which I really knew a lot less than I supposed.  But fortunately, I turned to my critique partner Janine and my co-blogger Meredith, who are both better analytical thinkers than I am and who generously shared their knowledge and insight.  Still I worried and worried and gave up crashing the Harlequin bash Friday night for fine-tuning the workshop in the bowels of the hotel.

And if I may say so, I think the workshop was a hit.  Up until we were interrupted by fire alarms, that is.  I kid you not, about half way into the workshop, the lights on the firealarms started flashing and then someone came on the intercom and asked everyone to please evacuate the building.  (According to Meredith, it was a bomb threat!)  We were outside for about ten minutes before we were allowed back inside.  I rushed through the rest of the presentation–I’d roped Meredith in to read my example excerpts for me and I was bummed that she didn’t get to read her own from Bound by Your Touch–in little bit of time we had left.

The silver lining–and you know there is one: The quality of my slideshow really went down after bullet point number 2 on how to improve your romantic chemistry, because the hotel had no wifi and I could not access the internet, I ran out of images to use to illustrate my points.  Guess at which point we were interrupted?  Bullet point number 2!

Needless to say, I didn’t bother to reconnect my laptop to the audiovisual setup after we came back from the bomb threat.

Oh, and let me not forget to say that I wore the red halter top that I would have wore to the Harlequin bash to my workshop.  I was determined to inflict my dancing clothes on my listeners since it was for their sake that I’d missed the party. 

5) The Fashionista Me.

I am no fashionista.  In fact, most of the time I wear the same three outfits over and over again.  But RWA is the one week in the year when I haul out of every little party dress in my closet and give them a workout.  It’s also just about the only time in the year when I dig through my drawers to find my make-up and put it on.

Normally I go to RWA with just the wardrobe I have, not the wardrobe I wish I had.  But this year I discovered the fabulous retailer known as White House Black Market.  If you don’t know the place, it’s a medium-priced store selling well-made pieces the vast majority of which are either black, white, or both.  I fell in love with it immediately, and that is saying something as I rarely buy black clothes–don’t know why but black as a clothing color just does not excite me.

So, ahem, I went a little crazy in WHBM–lots of things were on sale that day.  I ended up  purchasing four cocktail dresses, including a gorgeous little black number for the RITAs.  (Long time ago, on a 60 minutes segment on Rudolf Nureyev, someone said of going to see him dance, “Even if you aren’t into baseball, when Babe Ruth plays, you go.”  And that little black dress was Babe Ruth.  It was Nureyev.)

And it was fun, fun, fun trotting about in pretty new frocks every day.  It was delicious.  It was addictive.

Must…not…go…back…to…WHBM…anytime…soon…

Oh look, a brochure from them in the mail.  And a coupon!

6) The Vibrating Mascara Wand

I always room with a bunch of my chaptermates from Austin.  Austin RWA is a wonderful, vibrant group.  It’s a treat every year to room with these fantastic women, stay in bed, and talk till late into the night.  In the last couple of years,  my RWA schedule has been jam-packed, so I’ve had less time to spend with my homeys.  But the half hour before the RITAs reminded me just how much I love them.

My roommates gave me a artful-messy French twist to go with my Nureyev LBD.  They primered the heck out of my almost non-existent eyelashes, put glitter eyeliner on me, and used a vibrating mascara wand for the finishing touch.  (Vibrating mascara wand!)  And all throughout, they oohed and aahed at me, my roommie Shelley, who is the prettiest and most put together woman you can imagine–her notebooks are color-tabbed!–said that she felt like a mother whose daughter is about to get married.

And I felt…just embraced and buoyed and exhilarated by so much love and support.  I am privileged to know these ladies and privileged to be a girl, so that I could know the joy of such sisterhood.  Thank you, Shelley, Tracy, and Courtney!

7) The Three Musketeers

I finally met my dear friend and critique partner Janine for the first time.  Janine and I have known each other a long time–since May of 2003 when she first emailed me to tell me she enjoyed the Desert Isle Keeper review I’d written for Judith Ivory’s BEAST at All About Romance.

We corresponded for a year–novella length emails–before we became critique partners.  I’m very picky about whom I’d show my work to and was hesitant to take our friendship to the next level.  But it has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made in  my life.

And Janine made Meredith’s and my instant friendship possible.  She is such a wonderful person that I immediately trust those whom she trusts.

So it was wonderful meeting her at last and we talked exactly like we’ve been IM’ing all these years.  And of course fabulous to hang out with her and Meredith together, we the three musketeer.  We didn’t do nearly enough of it.  I must make sure next year that I don’t have a workshop to prepare at the last minute.

The conference itself

Writers, bloggers, agents, editors, publishers–we are all readers first and foremost.  RWA National is my yearly immersion in the energy and warm fuzzy of the genre.  I had so much fun seeing old friends and meeting new people and talking about what we all love.  And next year, watch out, I will boogie at the Harlequin bash and I will rule the dance floor!

(Run for your lives, in other words.) 

(And would you believe it, I started this post right after I came home from Nationals.  Deadlines, what can I say?  And I’m still not done yet.  But I can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel.)

We will both be signing at the Literacy Autographing, which is open to the public.

Wednesday, July 15
5:30-7:30 p.m.
Marriott Wardman Park Hotel, Exhibit Hall

I was reading Joanna Bourne’s blog a while back and Jo, much better prepared than either Meredith or I, had custom bookplates printed ahead of time so that she could give them to readers who already had her books at home.   And I thought, what a great idea.  I emailed Jo and asked her about it, she very kindly emailed me back with step-by-step instruction on how to obtain similar bookplates.  Alas, then I asked the crucial question: How long would it take?

Well, there just wasn’t enough time.  So I abandoned the idea for a while.  But then I since I regularly make bookplates from mailing labels–not very pretty ones by the way, just functional–I thought, oh, what the heck, let me give it a try at home.

So for Meredith, I took the masthead from her website and shrank it down to fit a 1″ x 2 5/8″ label.

For myself, I did a little photoshopping and came up with this:

Pretty, non?

I have to be honest though, as they didn’t come out of my home printer, with its much tortured color cartrige, which I have been ruthlessly refilling the way the French force feed their foie gras geese, quite as beautifully as they are rendered here.  The first batch for mine was good, but Meredith’s was a bit on the blue side, so I surmised that it was because there wasn’t enough yellow ink.

I took the cartridge to the bathroom and began to ram yellow ink down its gullet.  But of course I put too much, as always.  So second batch for Meredith has one row that is quite, um, autumnal.  But that’s okay, as grass can be yellow.  But it wrecked much greater havoc with mine and produced green skies!

Now I ripped out the cartridge again, intending to put in more blue ink to correct for the overabundance of yellow, only to have blue ink ooze out on its own.  At which point I hastily blotted cartridge, bathroom sink, and my blue-black fingers and cried, “I quit this b*tch!”

Where was I?  Oh, ahem, well, yes, off-color (no pun intended) or not, Meredith and I still have a small supply of bookplates.  Please do come say hi and get a signed bookplate or two for your collection at home.  We’ll even supply you with “Autographed by Author” stickers for you to put on the covers.  (Yes, Meredith, you can has them too.)

This is going to be so much fun. 

(And if my fingers are still blue tomorrow evening, you’ll know why!)

I had a wonderful time at the RWA National Conference in Dallas.

Tuesday night was the occasion of a great dinner meeting with Kristin Nelson, my agent. Then Wednesday was the event that should go down in conference history as the most enviable four hours ever: Kristin took a bunch of us lucky gals to the spa, and not just any spa, the fourth best spa in the whole of the U.S. of A. I had the best facial of my entire life. All my pores disappeared, completely. Completely. Can you beat that?

After the spa was the Bookseller’s Tea. Booksellers are to published authors what editors and agents are to pre-published authors–the Holy Grail. There was the big old ballroom, and likely a 15-to-1 ratio of authors to booksellers. It was like Almack’s, full of hopeful debutantes eyeing the few titled, rich prospects, dreaming of an introduction and a dance. And the Duke of Eligibility was, of course, Sue Grimshaw of Borders, who, along with the Marquis of Desirability, Tina Trevaskis (also of Borders), were pinned to a corner the whole of the reception by a mob of us eager authors dying to impress them with our saleability. They were both beyond gracious.

I’d briefly met Sara Megibow, Kristin’s assistant, at the spa. Sara’s photo, if you’ve ever come across it on Kristin’s website, does not do her justice. She is Adorable. After the bookseller’s event I saw her again, and her Adorable son, and her Adorable husband, who described her hair as having copper flecks when the light strikes it. Can you top that in a man? He just proved wrong every naysayer who said men don’t notice such things. I think they are the most adorable family I’ve ever met.

That evening I went to a cocktail party hosted by superpublicist Nancy Berland. Almost as soon as I walked into the door, I met someone who had an ARC of my book. I’d been to the goody room only 45 min before, and it hadn’t arrived yet, so it was very exciting to see that the copies did get there. The lady who had my ARC then proceeded to ask me to sign it for her mother, which I gladly did. My first signing ever. And guess who the lady was? Faygie Levy, the editor-in-chief of Romantic Times. You can’t beat that for a good omen. I think I must have willingly sacrificed myself to not one, but a whole horde of gorgeous, domineering conquerors, and saved cities, instead of mere villages.

Midway through the party, I was sitting alone at a table, munching thoughtfully–I semi-suck at mingling but never have trouble eating. Someone asked me if she could join me. Her badge said she was a librarian. I love libraries and librarians, so I told her of course she could join me. Only after she sat down did I realize she was RWA’s Librarian of the Year. We went on to have a wonderful conversation about books we love, so wonderful that I didn’t even once look at the Dallas panorama behind me (we were up high in the Reunion Tower).

On my way down the Tower that evening, Nora Roberts and a bunch of her friends came into the elevator. She stood next to me for 200 feet down and I silently basked in her glow. There’s no need to talk to La Nora. She just is. And I just bask.

Thursday I met Jane from DearAuthor for lunch. Jane is gorgeous. I mean, the woman made partner at her law firm when she was 28, runs one of the most influential romance blogs in her spare time–all that, and did I mention she is beautiful ? (I’m sorry but I believe I’ve said on this blog before that I’m shallow as a dinner plate.) The caliber of women that I’m fortunate enough to meet never fails to astonish me.

Thursday afternoon I had to do homework. You would think I’d resent the heck out of it: 2000 women having a good time at the bar (no workshops Thurs pm) and I was doing homework. But the truth was I rather enjoyed it. The homework was for a corporate taxation class, and I love tax classes. I just do. I don’t know why. Nerds write the hottest romances, yeah!

Friday I attended a rather august luncheon, with heavy hitters from Library Journal, Publisher’s Weekly, American Library Association, Borders, and Books-a-Million. And a whole bunch of bestseller authors–and me (I’m not sure how that came about either). Most everyone else was dressed business casual. I looked as if I was hoping to nab a beau at a garden party. So thank goodness for Linda Lael Miller, whose outfit was as colorful as sunrise over the Mediterranean.

Friday night was the cocktail reception hosted by Random House, my publisher, where it was great fun meeting Sandy Coleman and Anne Marble from All About Romance, which I’d been reading since at least 1998. Sandy and I reminisced over Susan Johnson’s earlier works. And we shared some fangirl love of Judith Ivory, who has unfortunately dropped off the face of the earth. I told her the story of how I always pounce on Steve Axelrod, Judith Ivory’s agent, whenever I see him, to ask about her. Alas for the rest of you Ivory lovers out of there, at least according to Mr. Axelrod, no releases for her this year. So much for the hopeful rumor that I’d heard.

After the cocktail party, a bunch of Bantam authors went out to dinner. I sat next to Shana Abe and Lara Adrian and we had a great time imagining ourselves living close by to Mr. Clooney on Lake Como. We would join the local council and be very active in the community and he would, of course, admire our public spirit and talent. And from time to time, he would bring over his good friend Mr. Pitt. And between Shana and Lara and me, we decided that we might just have boobs and lips enough to steal his attention away from Miss Jolie for a minute or so.

The big event for me, on Saturday, was the signing. So of course I would forget to change out of my sneakers (thank goodness for table skirts). I saw Sybil from The Good, the Bad, and the Unread helping setting up the tables. We’d met on Thursday. For some stupid reason I’d imagined her as middle-aged. But she, like Jane, turned out to be Young and Hawt. What’s with all the attractive bloggers taking over the world? So I helped her set up tables. And it wasn’t until a few minutes later that I realized I was setting up tables not for Bantam, but St. Martin’s. But what the heck. We went on to set up another table or two for St. Martin’s.

And then, of course, just before the signing was about to start, I realized I’d forgotten both my camera and the huge box of 81 gel pens I’d bought for the signing. I’d been lusting after those pens for years, but told myself I couldn’t have such useless items unless I actually had a signing. Taking pity on me, the wonderful Sara Megibow went and fetched the pens from my room. They were a tremendous hit, especially the glitter gel pens in all colors of the rainbow.

What can I say about the signing? It was fabulous, the best signing of my life! Bantam had done a wonderful poster for each author, provided tons of books, and the attendees who lined up were all so nice to me. A huge contingent from my home chapter of Austin turned out to support me, as well as several readers of this blog–Bev, Maria, and Karmela, or did I meet Karmela some other spot in the hotel? Lovely to meet y’all!–plus the ladies from the Romance Divas, and one of the Head Bitches Herself, Candy from SB, who is–I repeat myself again–another young, hawt blogger taking over the world.

Sorry for the lack of photos. Leslie Langtry, one of Kristin’s authors, graciously lent her camera to take a picture of me at the but it might be a bit before I get hold of it.

So at this point I’m thinking that the conquerors to whom I’d sacrificed myself weren’t gorgeous at all. And I’d saved whole countries. Because good karma on this magnitude just doesn’t happen naturally. But I’m not quite at the end of my run of good luck yet.

It took me a while to unwind from the autographing. Then I went with my roomies, including the gorgeous and talented Catherine Avril Morris, out to dinner. Of course I overstuffed myself. And of course when I got back I had trouble getting into my Rita gown. I’d told Kristen Painter from Romance Divas I’d clap for her during the Golden Heart awards, so I wobbled down to the ballroom, very gingerly sat down, mindful of my dress’s likelihood of exploding from containing too much of me, and clapped (It was sooooo considerate of Kristen’s category to come up as soon as I sat down!) So five minutes later, I wobbled out of the ballroom, headed for the privacy of my room and the luxury of exiting from the very restrictive Rita gown.

The folks from RomanceNovel.tv were shooting interviews with Rita nominees outside the ballroom. Jane had pimped me to them earlier. They were just wrapping up. Guess who was helping them out? Sybil. I don’t think I’ve said it yet but Sybil is a tiger. An absolute tiger. She grabbed me, grabbed the RomanceNovel.tv folks, and got them to agree to interview me, a nobody whose book isn’t even coming out for another six, seven, or is it eight months?

I realized then that I had no makeup on, but what the hell. So there I was, in my naked face, standing next to the very tall and very elegant Sophia Nash, my kindly interviewer. And two minutes later it was done. Now the good folks from RomanceNovel.tv might feed the tape to the shredder when they get home, but it was certainly fun getting interviewed.

I must have single-handedly diverted a giant meteor from crashing into earth.

Okay, finally, the end of this long, rambling post is in sight. I think I’d written it down more for myself–so I don’t forget–than for anyone else. It was wonderful in Dallas and it is wonderful to be back home. Now I’d better get back to all the homework piled up. School ends on August 13. I’m going on a long-awaited vacation with my family shortly after that. Then I’ll come home and spend the rest of the kids’ summer vacation playing computer games with them. So expect regular posts to resume in early September.

And in honor of the new Harry Potter movie and the imminent arrival of Book 7, let me leave you with my favorite Harry Potter Youtube video–Ron and Hermione as Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth. Enjoy.